爱，永不止息

永             不                  止                         息
年  复  一  年  ， 日  复  一  日
时  间  再  长  ，空  间  再  大
依 依 不 舍，心 心 相 印
永 不 止 息 

俗语常说，爱如细水长流
纵然海枯石烂，地老天荒，也永不止息
从前我以为这些都是古人夸大般的爱情
即使圣经常常提到
我也不知道是否每一根骨头都相信这爱情
有时候活得越久却越确定只是头脑的认知
Theory 跟 experience 还有好些距离
直到某时某刻
好像突然想通了一点点
这里一点点 那里一滴滴
回头一看
原来远在天边近在眼前
她一直以来都在以身作则
教导我爱的功课
让我见证最纯洁最真挚的爱
多年来从不变改
即使倚靠过别人
唯一就是唯一
唯一仍然唯一
无  可  取  替
提及爱人仍牵起喜怒哀乐
像未曾分离过一样
时间失去了以往的限制

他们的爱
付出得义无反顾
他们的爱
最后坚持了下来
他们的爱
病魔死神也夺不走
他们的爱
每天每天都在酝酿着我跟小弟成长

有一天
如在天堂相聚
我话不多说
给我们一个大大的拥抱
让我同样地感受到
爱 永无止息
便可

給自己友善的提醒，其中之一

今天的我，失去了平時信靠 主應有的耐性。

然而，天父沒有責備燕儀，

反而，天父溫柔地提醒我，

愛是恆久忍耐，
即使在迷途中也不要失去指望，
學著時時倚靠天父的耐性，
在迷途中享受著天父的同在及指引。



“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.” Rainer Maria Rilke 

"Love is patient..."
Today was not a lovely day for me.
Not only did I lost the patience that I normally seek from God,
I lost my dependence on Him.
After all, God did not scold at me.
Instead, He kindly reminded me about His Love.
What is love?
Love is patient.
Even in the midst of confusion and frustration,
I shall never lose hope and love.
Always learn to depend on His Patience,
wherever there is Patience, there is Love.
Let me find beauty in messy situation,
and more importantly,
rejoice in God's presence and guidance.
"...Our hearts are restless until they find peace in You."
- St. Augustine's Confession. Oh the Art of Letting Go.

整理過後的衣櫥

大概兩年前在一個偶然的機會下參加了Ma牧師在哈佛大學那邊舉行的一個小型分享晚會。當天因為跟表弟和他的朋友遲到了，所以坐在了最前的第一排。他是一位很蒙恩的僕人，無論是分享生命的見證還是傳揚 神的愛，他的一詞一句都是充滿力量。即使是我那未信主的表弟他也因此敬佩這位 神的僕人盡心盡力熱情而不乏謙卑的態度。當我們禱告的時候，馬牧師給我們祝福；我永遠不會忘記當時他對我說的幾句話。雖然我們初次見面，但他卻靠著聖靈的能力說出了 神給與我的恩賜。他所說的恩賜是完全跟我以往的經歷與朋友們的評價吻合。我除了感到驚訝，就是特別的感恩。一直以來，我都不忘用這恩賜來榮耀 神，侍奉 神，讚美 神。

昨晚又有機會在Good TV裡聽到Ma牧師的見證，感到非常的感動。他對 神的態度，完全順服的心是非常值得我學習。

那整理過後的衣櫥怎磨會跟馬牧師連起來呢？

原因就是兩年前我正讀著他寫的一本書，而我每晚讀那書的地點就是在衣櫥裡面。當我還有良好的習慣每天做靈修的時候，衣櫥是我與 神“相約”的地方。記得Ronnie姐姐曾給我一本小書，裡面有一頁提到我們心靈與 神相約的時候。我選擇了在衣櫥裡，不讓任何人和事打擾，靜靜地，禱告，讀聖經，唱敬拜讚美的詩歌。。。 即使衣服有時候會開始亂，但我一直都保持著地面和最右邊的地方清潔和整齊，好讓我能安心地靈修。

兩年很快就過去了，因著生活變得較繁忙，考SAT申請大學等待通知舞會畢業典禮等等等讓我越來越少踏入這衣櫥，聆聽 神的話語。當然，還好衣櫥不是唯一我與 神相遇的地方。不過我在衣櫥裡面與 神溝通，有分享也有成長，這些都是對我很重要的經歷。。。就像跟重要的人愛的人一起常去的地方，即使是普通的一條街道，也會變得特別有意義。

這衣櫥上個星期可給我添了不少麻煩，但後來 神原來是要教我更加關心家人，更加愛我們這一家。雖然這課上得有點苦，但結果是甘甜的，因為祂一直都在掌權。

現在這刻，我又回到了這熟悉的地方，感恩著，懷念著，想念著，那位愛我對我從未言棄的 神。這一路以來，我除了感恩之外，我不知道用另外哪些形容詞了。這窄路，這恩典之路，不是人人都願意走。但願意走的，請走得徹底。

善意的提醒，翁燕儀，請你繼續常常記掛著 神，以信心以行動來表達你的愛，正如對你自己的家人一般。每天每刻都要讚頌你是 神，因為 祢是著得我永永遠遠敬佩的！祢有著完全的愛，無限的智慧，及掌權於宇宙萬物的能力，祢卻時時刻刻看顧著眇小的我！！！ :'）

Pray, because I'm weak...

I wanted to sleep until the morning so badly. I miss those days where I can just sleep whenever and wherever. For the past week I've been sleeping at 6 or 7 am for no reason. Maybe cos the week before that I formed a really bad sleeping schedule. tonight once again I woke up at 3 am after trying to sleep until 8 am. Something was bothering me so I played about it. Then I realized that its already christmas eve. a song that I sang on the street with j2 was peaceful night. I was praying about that too. sometimes I get too ahead of myself and forget where I am... I pray that this christmas God will change my certain attitudes and transform me into a more Jesus-like person... Amen


5:20am 終於放棄了嘗試睡覺的念頭。。。跟自己說，就當是早起吧。 來到廚房，打開盧頭，我要喝媽媽特製的花生豬骨木瓜湯！！！ 回來了兩天，竟然發現自己好像不太習慣在家裡睡，老是失眠。。。青春荳荳也出了兩粒。

喝完湯，我要讀書！！！我要禱告！我要讀唐牧師的講道！！！
今天有人很興奮地跟我分享讀書的快樂。
因為將會學自己喜歡的東西，所以極其興奮。
那我自己呢？好學之心到哪裡去了？慚愧！有待改進。。。加油！

6：50am
兩碗湯一碗飯，吃飽之後可以做自己喜歡做的事情了。

給我親愛的兩位。。。

有一對年老的夫婦，他們一直都是默默地支持BCNC。

他們很有錢，但他們從不囂張也不顯耀自己所擁有的。

我們只見過幾次，但每次交談都如爺爺奶奶那般親切。

我覺得自己很幸運，

或者這樣說吧，

天父真的很保佑我，

總是將人間天使擺在我身邊，讓我總是感受被愛！

在我生命中，

有很多人根本不可能跟我這樣的年齡，背景及生活中很多不同的方面都任何有接觸，

往往認識這些人不是跟我擦身而過，而是我並肩而行，時時給予我鼓勵和支持。

即使他們比我早出生幾十年，但他們願意陪伴著我的成長，關心著我的一切。

像他們這樣的人我生命中有很多，真的很感謝主！

卡片前面寫的是我申請大學這個過程的總結：

“sometimes what I want, 

I don't get.

Yet in my belief,

God always knows 

me better than 

myself

So I gratefully accept,

and embrace

every moment  

of

LIFE

It always turns out 

that

His plan is always better than mine"

:)

真的，從前我總認為女校很適合我。

一天到晚都是想著進女校。

曾經我猶豫過一下，但因為習慣了舊想法，

所以就將那份猶豫打退，繼續像女校進發。

當我很固執地一定要進這女校時，神讓我學習了祂才是掌管一切的 神。

到了我在BC遇到一些情況及認識一些交得過心的朋友，

我才發現，還是 神為我預備的學校比較好。

個人的成長，不在於學校，

真正在於這個人如何從生活里看見 神奇妙的安排及背後的美意，

從而活出生命的真義。

這回要弄一張

“大學生NO WHINING”

的海報貼在牆上

for You

Thank God, I got a weekly prayer buddy now :)
I met Jemima from Child Growth and Development class. We shared similar Christian value and we are both passionate about being the light and salt for others! From the first day we met, I knew God planned it for a reason. I pray to God that our friendship can bloom over the next four years of college as well as in life. Thank God for this beautiful sister!!!

Still growing strong!
Heavenly Father,
I may be weak and fall into temptations often,
but please continue to remind me the beauty of Your love!
I need You in my life!!!

有一个姑娘

有一个姑娘她有一些任性她还有一些嚣张
有一个姑娘她有一些叛逆她还有一些疯狂
没事吵吵小架反正醒著也是醒著
没事说说小谎反正闲著也是闲著
有一个姑娘她有一些任性她还有一些嚣张
有一个姑娘她有一些叛逆她还有一些疯狂
喔～是哪个姑娘呀
ha～我就是这个姑娘(啊)
整天嘻嘻哈哈遇到风儿就起浪
也曾迷迷糊糊大祸小祸一起闯
还曾山山水水敢爱敢恨走四方
整天嘻嘻哈哈遇到风儿就起浪
也曾迷迷糊糊大祸小祸一起闯
还曾山山水水敢爱敢恨走四方
更曾轰轰烈烈拼死拼活爱一场

1998年，

那时侯小弟弟还没有出生，

只能透过妈妈的肚皮探索这世界。

不知道他有没有好奇到底他姐姐整天在唧唧喳喳唱什么呢？

嘻嘻没错！

就是“有一个姑娘”

没想到十三年就这样过去了

对“还珠格格”里面的人物，音乐，情景还记忆犹新，

好像昨天才唱着“有一个姑娘”找我村里姐妹去了

有时侯对旧片重温有点抗拒

因为它代表着回不了的过去

流逝的岁月

短暂的人生

这生命要无悔且精彩地活着，

就先得找到人生的真义。

愿天父带领燕仪。

”ha～我就是这个姑娘(啊)
整天嘻嘻哈哈遇到风儿就起浪
也曾迷迷糊糊大祸小祸一起闯
还曾山山水水敢爱敢恨走四方
整天嘻嘻哈哈遇到风儿就起浪
也曾迷迷糊糊大祸小祸一起闯
还曾山山水水敢爱敢恨走四方
更曾轰轰烈烈拼死拼活爱一场”

真的吗？

谈何容易啊 我亲爱的小燕子～

給最親愛的。。。

久違的你

再次接觸

熟悉依然

期待已久

終於如願

最愛的你

永遠最好

再次接觸

回憶過往

排球場上

熱汗熱淚

心跳加速

喊著叫著

疲累倒地

享受依然

最愛排球

趁著年輕

堅持到底

好好珍惜

p e a c e at bc

Here I am

sitting under a tree with such well-grown branches 

that it c o m p l e t e l y  s w a l l o w s  me inside its dark shadow

If I were to 

seek out 

for 

the 

bright 

sunlight

I must be aggressive and fight my way through

multiple layers of leaves above me

that 

separates 

me

and 

the sky 

where I believe 

I 

belong

The big Gasson Hall bell

is making noises again

"Ding Ding Ding"

as if it were my personal protest:

LET ME OUT! 

I WANT TO BE WHERE THE LIGHT IS!

WHAT HAPPENED TO MY COLORFUL WORLD?!

The protest remain in silence simply because...

the birds

that are flying above me

out-voices me

when I look up towards the sky again

all I see is a layer of grey clouds

separating 

me 

and 

the sunlight

where I still believe 

I 

belong

***

I take a d e e p breath

***

Instead

of 

looking

up

I decide to 

look 

a-r-o-u-n-d

Then I see something interesting.

Guess what?

As layers of leaves

and couple of build blocks

cause the sky to form an irregular triangle 

within my sight

then

I see blue.

Besides that,

I see 

people's moving shadow

dark, different length, and constantly switching shape

except for this time,

the darkness comes from the light

that I've been searching for

that I believe I belong

that I still believe I belong

***

In a matter of seconds

I am going to get up

and walk towards that piece of the bright sky

that I just discovered

The day is good

and will be good

because it is what you make of it

and more importantly,

it is what you believe you will make of it

***

 p e a c e at bc

Mid-night enjoyment- reading Antigone :)

"We are asked to see that a conflict-free life would be lacking in value and beauty next to a life in which it is possible for conflict to arise; that part of the value of each claim derives from a special separateness and distinctness that would be eclipsed by harmonization."- Nussbaum (1986, p.81)

So well and beautifully written. I totally agree!!! This was the exact idea that I attempted to express to my dearest Sagwa Shawnna Fighta earlier on facebook chat while updating each other about college. To put the idea into simpler words: life without struggles is not worth living because we do not get to grow to our fullest. My beliefs is that the more struggles, the more one can grow. Of course, there are different direction of where one could grow- be defeated and grow into a failure, or be victorious and grow into someone truly beautiful. I know I have the most Powerful and Mighty God by my side, I will be victorious! 

At first, I was not a big fan of this cover so I thought Antigone was a play that I never read before. But as I read more about the introduction, I realized I read Antigone in the huge high school literary book! Absolutely love this play! I noticed that my little bro Jin and I both have affinity for anything Greek related. I love reading about Greek culture and how the ancient people interact with each other. I then combine what I know from watching Chinese drama to the lifestyle and values Greeks. They are so different in millions of ways yet so similar! 

I really enjoy reading. 

It provides me a safe and calm space to just go back to the minds of people who lived thousands of years before me, and to connect with them as if they were still alive! 

Reading also allows me to grow not physically, but mentally and spiritually. I get to grow from my heart as new epiphanies come up everything I read something triggers my thoughts.

Reading expands my views of the world.

Therefore, I would never stop reading! :) 

let me

keep r-e-a-d-i-n-g

Keep t...h...i...n...k...i...n...g

Keep growiNG

從前鄉下的 快樂 中秋節

一位又一位

小朋友

一個又一個

小燈籠

在漆黑的夜裡

跑著 跳著 歡笑著

沒錯，從前的我們

就像擺在放大鏡下面的螢火蟲

雖然我們的燈光

不必村燈 亮

也不必月光 長久

但是我們的燈光

卻在回憶中留下最美印象最深刻的光點

五顏六色的小小燈籠呀

曾經你帶給我的快樂

至今依然甜於心頭

雖然“中秋節”三字已經變得有點陌生

“月餅”跟“賞月”的意義也不同了

但往往想起從前小時候中秋節的場景

那住在我裡面的小燕儀

就會很自然地流露純真的笑容

感謝天父讓燕儀出生於台山

享盡祢所創造的大自然

也留下了美好的童年回憶

讚美 主

中秋節

大家

要

快樂

記住要

笑

因為洪牧師說過：世界上沒有醜陋的人，因為每當人笑的時候，其實都很美。

讓我們一起美吧！

A Day Worthy of Noting... :)

I am mad.......................... tired!

but ended the night with a fulfilling dinner at China Pearl. 

YUP YUP!

Introducing to you Chinese Historical Society of New England
/Waterman-Waring-Langone Scholarship New Recipients

Yanyi Weng 

(the photo on the right is her, to be exact...)

I am really grateful for all the people 

that believe in me

invest in me

support me

encourage me

and give me the chance to chase after my dreams!

For everybody that I chatted

and shared smile with today,

 I want to give a LOUD shout outs for them!

Joseph, Ms. Tong, 

Daniel, Jonathan, Helen, Nicole, Adam, Carmen, 

Prof.Shirley, Prof.Peter, Chu, 

that old couple, who loved my smile, Kenneth, who offered me compliment,

and everyone else who were on the stage sharing their inspirational stories!

As my relationship with my community grew more tightly every year,

I felt a stronger calling for me to stay and simple serve my community.

I believe that everyone has a calling in their lives,

as for me, 

I am hearing louder and louder voice in serving in the Asian Community.

If this is the path that You are leading me Lord, 

let me be an obedient daughter and gratefully receive the blessings that You have stored for me!

Poetry for OTE

"like a beautiful butterfly spreading her wings 

towards the gorgeous sunflower fields"

these are the last words in my college essay

Stay beautiful, Yanyi.

No matter where you are in the future,

be yourself and stay beautiful

That's my promise for my future self

Over and over again I told myself, 

I am ready

I am ready to leave

I am ready to explore

I am ready to grow

I am ready to be heard

I am ready to fly away

fly far far away...

But wait,

I heard a voice holding me back.

In Chinese she says,

daughter,

don't go too far

this family can not afford to lose you

your little brother needs you

I am not ready to let you go

the world is too dangerous

I need keep you by my side

so I can watch over you

don't go too far

I took her words into my heart,

but I excused myself:

Mother, please let me go.

let me go out to the world

so I can learn to protect you

I will be back

I promise.

Six weeks into OTE,

I realize that the world is so big,

that I can never understand how each and every of you

rises above your hardships and survives to make it to OTE

I may not understand, 

but I can listen.

I can try to feel how you feel.

In a community with 47 other OTE scholars,

every single day,

I learned from 47 different personalities.

I remembered the first time when a scholar shared with me her story

in the green line back to Boston.

The ride felt longer than usual,

because I was exposed to a heartfelt conversation

that I rarely experience

The strength in her voice,

and the passion in her eyes,

painted her face with angelic beauty.

I told her

I can never understand what you went through

but I promise to be your support.

I may not be there in the past,

but I promise I will be there for you in the future.

That was actually the moment when OTE is no longer just a summer program,

OTE is my new family. 

Just as I promise my mother,

I decided to protect every friend that I meet at OTE, and at Boston College.

Because I believe that everyone is beautiful.

We all deserve to be beautiful.

First part of the poem that I performed today.

To be continued... :)

until I type up that other half... heheee

MORNING MORNING!!!

Dear Yanyi Weng,
just wanted to say ADD OIL!
I have three minutes to spare before I need to start editing my essay.
One more week I will be out of here :)
finish strong, make me proud!!!

Despite the absence of Grandpa Sun, let me make every day bright by living every moment of it. Be the sunshine for others... ADD OIL!!!

Dear Heavenly Father,
I am missing something... please open my eyes of my heart and let me see it.

In Your beloved Son's name,
Amen.

Flashback...

the cheerful voice,

the genuine smile,

the innocent eyes,

the hope and love found within 

the invisible link between

Grandfather and Grandson.

I would never forget the note 

given to me by that old man

the wrinkles near his eyes

painted his age

but the stroke of the red marker in his hand

appeared more youthful than ever

There he was

sitting right next to his grandson

drawing him a picture of love

he took the scissor 

and cut out a heart

as if he was in his grandson's age

making a lovely card for his own grandfather

If there is any place on earth

called Heaven.

That day,

that moment,

I saw angelic beauty, 

and felt God presence,
for He is the very definition of
s a c r i f i c i a l  love 

The smile that he showed me...

vividly last until this day

and many more days to come

in the unknown future
not full of fear,
but full of LOVE.

"Like Grandfather, Like Grandson"-Yanyi Weng

Flashback to the My Father's Day Event 2 years ago!

近朱者赤，近墨者黑

生氣了

真很氣

聽著那自豪的聲音

彷彿成就了一件正義 的事情

錯，是毫無真正意義的事情

今天的話題挑起了那條隱形界線

有時候，放在同學＿與＿朋友之間，是必要的

好朋友提醒我：

不需每位同學都要成為朋友

不需每位朋友都要成為知己

近朱者赤，近墨者黑

當黑暗的勢力來臨時

個人反抗能力特大

情緒也一樣

腦子一下子就氣到無語的狀態

整個房間都安靜下來了

剩下的只有他的聲音，

那高傲的聲音

難聽得

。。。不得了

然而

大家的沈默鼓勵著他

繼續那所謂的理論

忍不住了

火山爆發：

處女有甚麼問題？

心想：

難道要像你那樣，

要以跟女孩同床的次數來展示自己有多開放？

有多適合美國這道德顛倒的社會？

＊不過，為了避免一場口水戰爭，

當著眾人的面前我把話守住了

留點餘地

大家日後相處都不會那麼尷尬

［［或許，以上的全部都只是藉口，

我只是沒有勇氣去跟他辯論吧？

一對六

不簡單

神啊，求你下次添加給我勇氣，

讓我依著聖靈的聲音

說出造就別人的話語］］

看著我嚴厲的表情

他嘗試開玩笑，但其實是在保衛自己的論點：

難道你要找一個處男結婚，然後做聖母瑪利亞？

毫 不 猶 疑 地：對。

幾分鐘之後，

為了保衛自己的耳朵不被污染

我起步離開了那房間

遠離那些不良的影響

有些事，有些人，

只能遠觀，

不能近看。

否則，

傷的只會是我自己。

自我保護tips又增加了！

像Yelei說的：要保持現在的attitude

箴4:23 

“你要保守你心，

勝過保守一切，

因為一生的果效，

是由心發出”